Oh yes !!!! 22 yrs …and have changed a lot….my thoughts….my preferences ….my ambitions…..my desires…..
Many still think I am the old Jesse….they are not willing or not even wanting to accept that their old Jesse has changed ….. The greatest evidence is not my new way of dressing nor my way of speaking nor my habits but my preferences…..I no longer find satisfaction in things I longed for then. I never liked to be in His presence …I was a legalistic believer ..praying for my exams ….or maybe just to show others and satisfy myself that since I was a Christian I had to do certain things like reading the Bible or not wearing buttu / tilak etc. I cannot convince people coz those who think that I have not changed do believe that I am just pretending to have been changed,……The world pulls me no longer. No satisfaction in gossips that I once enjoyed from the bottom of my heart……….Then do I claim I am better than them….no no no …..I am not to judge others …although I am sure that since I have received much from Him and ‘to whom more is given more will be expected ‘…so I need to turn around and follow Him only… How amazing it is to know that even now after knowing much when I still make mistakes with a capital S, He is patient enough to correct me and love me again…Oh! How much I have hurt You and tried running away from You but You kept drawing nearer…nearer…now so much near that I am drunk with your wine and desire to stick onto You closer than ever before…my Love.
